Come in with me
by KokoroHana
Summary: Set after Yuu returned from his demon form in those four months time skip. Yuu has a favor to ask Mika but Mika is absolutely not pleased about that favor...
1. Chapter 1

"Come on, Mika. Please?"

Yuu begged, walking a few meters behind his friend through the village in which they lived now for just over three months in order to hide from the army after that incident at the airport of Nagoya.

"I said "no"."

Mika said without turning around.

"Only for one night."

"No."

"Until tomorrow morning."

"That's one night, so no."

"For an hour?"

"No."

"You can have most of the space."

"No."

"The whole blanket?"

"No."

"The pillow?"

"No."

"Why not? We always did that when we were kids."

"But we're not kids anymore, Yuu-Chan."

"But it still would be fun."

Mika stopped walking, causing Yuu almost to bump into him. He turned around to face him.

"Seriously…Why do you want us to share a bed so badly?"

"Because we didn't do that in a long time."

"…"

"So?"

"…No."

Mika said looking away from him.

He absolutely hadn't a clue why Yuu was so fixated on sharing a bed with him all of a sudden. It has been three weeks since he returned from his demon form and had slept alone in that shed since then. Everything seemed normal. But this morning he suddenly came to him, suggesting that they could sleep together in one bed like they did back then and he didn't want to let up on that idea since mentioning it the first time…and it was already late in the afternoon.

No matter how many times Mika told him he doesn't want to, Yuu just didn't give up. He tried to avoid him for some time just to have some peace, since he was getting quite annoying but that didn't help. He was following him everywhere, not letting up once. He even tried to ignore him once but if Yuu was being ignored he was even more annoying than before. At this moment he would be more than glad to see Shinoa and the others just to get rid of him for a while but they were too busy to help the villagers for the rest of the day so he had to deal with him alone.

"What's the big deal in sharing a bed?"

Mika sighed before looking at him again.

"Yuu-Chan. I'm a vampire. I don't need sleep."

Yuu looked at him as if expecting him to continue talking.

"…Is that all? Just because you don't need sleep?"

"Huh?"

Mika looked at him with an irritated expression

"If so then don't worry. If you don't need sleep, it's fine. You don't have to sleep, you can just stay awake, I don't mind."

"…"

 _Are you fucking kidding me?!_

"So? How's that sounding?"

"No."

"Why not? It's not like you had something to do at night."

"I have."

"For example?"

"Watching out that nobody from the army won't find us. Instead of shift change, all of you can sleep at night and since I stay awake the whole night anyway, I have something to do. It's a lot safer like this. "

"If they really had wanted to find us they would have found us already, don't you think?"

"…"

 _I know…We're not that far from Nagoya…If they really would had searched for us, they had definitely found us. But we didn't see a single soldier since escaping…Maybe we are of no interest to them anymore since they already have a play toy of their own which does everything what they tell it to do…_

"Mika?"

He was pulled out of his thoughts by hearing his name.

"Hm?"

"…Still not want to share a bed?"

He asked with a begging smile.

Mika only rolled his eyes in annoyance at this question before he started to walk again trying to get away from this useless discussion.

"H-hey wait."

Yuu called after him trying to keep up with him.

"Don't know why I should if you repeat yourself over and over again."

"Come on, don't be like that."

"…"

"I promise it's only for one night, nothing more."

"Did you listen at all?! I. Don't. Need. Sleep!"

"It's fine if you don't need any. Like I said, you can stay awake."

"…"

"Just for an hour. Not more. You have my word."

"…"

"I swear I won't ever ask again, just-"

Suddenly Mika stopped walking and turned around looking at him with an angry expression.

"WOULD YOU STOP FOLLOWING ME ALREADY?!"

He yelled at him causing Yuu slightly to wince at that sudden outburst and staring at him in surprise.

"…What-"

"I said: Stop. Following. Me! Since this morning you were nothing but annoying!"

"…I just-"

"I don't care! I don't care about what you want or why you want it! You repeat yourself constantly! And besides, I already said "no"! Do you even listen to what I say?! Can't you understand that not everyone is going to dance to your tune?! Stop forcing your will onto others already!"

"…"

"Stop bothering me! Just leave me alone!"

He shouted before turning around again and walking away, leaving a baffled Yuu behind. He never saw him that angry before and he couldn't remember a single time where he was ever angry at him for any reason.

… _I…didn't want to make him angry…and I'm not forcing my will onto others…I just-_

… _Well, it doesn't matter anymore anyway…_


	2. Chapter 2

As the sun was setting Shinoa and the others came back from their work. They were surprised to find Yuu all alone sitting in front of the shed, deeply in thought.

Usually he and Mika were inseparable, so it was rare to see only one of them without the other. When they asked him where Mika was he just shrugged his shoulders without saying anything. He didn't seem to want to talk about what happened so they didn't ask any further and they certainly couldn't ask Mika. He wouldn't answer anyway since he wasn't that talkative, except when he was talking with Yuu. But to them he was acting rather cold. Even after three months that didn't change much.

The first time after arriving at that village, no one of them really knew what to think of him or if they could trust him at all.

Especially Narumi had his problem with that since Yayoi and Kagiyama were murdered by vampires. He just couldn't trust one of them all of a sudden just because he helped them to escape.

The others also weren't sure how they should act towards him. Even though he was Yuu's childhood friend and family…he still was a vampire. And vampires were their enemies after all. Even if Yuu trusted him, there was no way to let their guard down so easily.

But they soon understood that Mika wasn't like the other vampires. Of course he preferred to be left alone and he pretty much never talked to them but he never acted hostile towards any of them or tried to run away with Yuu, like he tried in Shinjuku. He didn't act so high and mighty like other vampires did. He was acting rather normal, if it weren't for the eyes or the fangs, one could even say he was human.

He hadn't even drank blood since coming here. They wondered how he could even stand that. Everyone knew that vampires needed blood or else they…would die. But Mika didn't act much differently since they began to live here. Although he indeed seemed a little bit tensed from time to time. They thought about asking him if he needed blood, since they didn't want him to starve, but didn't dare to. They assumed he wouldn't answer them or would feel uneasy if they asked him that.

And even after Yuu had woken up he didn't seem to need it. But he did seem more relaxed than before.

Shinoa had her suspicions about that but kept them to herself since Mika obviously didn't want them to know and if even Yuu didn't talk about that subject, it probably wasn't meant for others to hear.

All of them tried to get along with him after all but that was easier said than done since they had no clue how to approach him.

Shortly after Yuu had turned back he tried to make him spend more time with them but that didn't work. The only one he really talked to and opened up to was Yuu after all. It took some time to convince him to let Mika some time to think about it and not to force him to.

It was understandable that it wasn't easy for him to trust any of them so easily after all what happened. He didn't talk to them and was always on his own in those three passed months and he also didn't seem to show interest in them at all. They knew if they wanted him to trust them, they had had to give him his space. If they would had tried to force him to interact with them, he probably would had feel driven into a corner and would never open up to them.

But at least that seemed to work. Lately he didn't seem so disinterested like before. He probably thought they wouldn't take notice but they had noticed that he watched them from time to time when they were outside, helping the villagers.

But it still seemed unlikely to them that he would talk about this fight he had with Yuu.

* * *

Since sleeping with Yuu in the same room when he was still in his demon form wasn't a good idea Shinoa and the others had slept in another shed.

But even as Yuu turned back to normal, they still wanted to wait if everything's really back to normal and not only temporarily. It was difficult enough to kill a vampire noble but to try to defeat a demon without killing him was another story. So they decided to sleep in different sheds.

Everyone noticed that Yuu wasn't his usual self that night. He didn't talk as much as he usually did and also had a rather sad expression. After he finished eating he went straight to bed, even though he was never the first who went early to bed. Whatever happened between him and Mika still seemed to bother him.

After they had finished eating they also went to bed even though they hadn't still a clue where Mika was. They thought about searching for him but since it was already dark outside, they wouldn't have found him anyway so they decided to search for him in the morning if he still wouldn't have returned yet.

It was late in the night as Mika returned, visibly more relaxed than this afternoon. He intentionally came back this late since he didn't want to encounter Yuu. Not because he was afraid that he would start to talk about sharing a bed again, but because he didn't know what to say to him after their fight earlier.

He sat down on the ground leaning against the shed in which Yuu was sleeping in. Like he did every night. Originally to watch out that they wouldn't be found by the army. But even before Yuu mentioned his doubts about them looking for them at all, he already suspected that they weren't searching for them. But even if he knew that he still sat out there to kill some time until morning. Usually he watched the stars but this night the sky was too cloudy. Instead he thought about a way to keep Yuu from having that stupid idea of sharing a bed together.

 _I really don't know where he got that idea all of a sudden…He's almost obsessed with that. No matter how many times I refuse, he just doesn't let up…and I'm afraid he won't do in the next few weeks…I know how persistent he can be but…there has to be a way to convince him to give up on that…a reasonable one…_

He remembered his surprised expression during their fight that afternoon.

… _I didn't mean to yell at him like that…I was just…so annoyed by him in that moment that I…really hadn't a clue what I was saying anymore…I said really terrible things to him…I hope I didn't hurt him with that…_

Suddenly he heard the door of Yuu's shed opening.

… _Speak of the devil._

He assumed that Yuu couldn't sleep and just wanted to breathe some fresh air…until he heard footsteps coming towards him. Before he could say something, Yuu sat down right beside him without looking at him.

Neither of them said anything, unsure what to say to each other after their argument. They were just sitting next to each other for the next few minutes until Yuu broke that silence, looking at him.

"…Sorry for…annoying you so much today…I won't do it again."

"…"

Mika was surprised to hear these words from him. It was unusual for him to be the first to apologize. He wasn't sure how to react so he stayed silent.

"…Don't…be angry at me anymore, okay? I'll… talk about that never again. I promise. Just…don't hate me…"

He said in a sad voice looking to the ground with a hurtful expression. Mika looked over to him. He gave a little smile before reaching out his hand and patting his head. Startled by this sudden touch Yuu looked at him again in surprise.

"I'm not angry anymore. I'm…the one who should apologize to you. I shouldn't have yelled at you like this. Sorry."

"…Well, to be honest…I deserved that. I…didn't even notice I was so annoying…so I should be the one apologizing…"

Mika gave him a warm smile while still patting his head.

… _His hair is…unexpectedly soft…_

He pulled his hand back again after a few seconds and looked straight ahead. In the corner of his eyes he saw that Yuu was still looking at him.

"What is it?"

Yuu hesitated for a moment before he asked:

"…Can I…sleep here tonight?"

"Why?"

"…Just want to."

"…"

" _Just want to"? Nice try. You just want to sleep here because I refused to share a bed with you. You really don't give up, huh?_

"Listen…You can't stay out here."

He said calmly while looking at him.

"Why not?"

"Because it's too cold for you out here. You should go back inside where it's warm."

"…And what about you? Aren't you cold, too?"

"It's okay for me. I'm a vampire. I can't feel cold."

Mika said with a sad expression.

"But-"

"I said it's okay."

"…"

He didn't want to argue with him again so he didn't say anything to that.

… _Don't say it's okay with a face like that…_

They both averted their gaze with Mika looking straight ahead again and Yuu looking to the side.

"…You know, you don't have to treat me like a human. I'm…not one anymore…"

"…Don't say that."

He said quietly looking over to him.

"Huh?"

"Don't say that I don't have to treat you like a human anymore."

"…"

"…I don't want to. I…don't want to treat you differently."

"…Why?"

"Because you're still Mika to me. Nothing has changed. Human or vampire. I will never treat you any differently than I did back then. No matter what."

He said determinately.

They looked into each other's eyes for a short while until Mika broke the gaze.

"…"

"…So…Can I stay here with you now?"

"Even if I say "no", you wouldn't listen to me anyway, right?"

"…Then…I'll stay here."

"But don't complain if you'll catch a cold. Just for your information, I won't take care of you!"

"Won't happen."

"We'll see."

Neither of them said anything while they were sitting right next to each other. Mika had just given up to try to tell him to go back inside. It was useless anyway. At least he didn't try to drag him into the shed anymore.

 _Slowly but surely I get the feeling that he just doesn't want to sleep alone…Does he have…nightmares or something like that and that's why he was so obsessed with sharing a bed? Does he just want some company at night? If so…then why doesn't he just ask one of…his friends?_

It was the first time he called them his friends and it felt strange to call them like that. He still didn't trust them completely. He had seen what the humans had done until now…what they did to Yuu…He just couldn't forget that. But he had to admit that these humans seemed…different. They really seemed to care about Yuu and protected him in the last fight from the army…They even protected him, a vampire, for Yuu's sake…even though they knew the consequences…He was uncertain. Uncertain what to think of them. Until now he strongly believed that all humans were the same and just wanted to use Yuu for their own purposes but… now he wasn't so sure about that anymore.

He had lived with them for three whole months now and he hadn't seen anything bad about them but he still acted distanced from them. He couldn't help it. Yuu was the only one he could still trust in this world after all. He just couldn't decide to trust humans just because they acted so friendly towards him so he kept his distance.

Despite of that they didn't bother him at all. They just said if he needed anything he was free to ask them. That's all. He actually expected them to act much noisier or to annoy him non-stop, trying to be friends with him. But they didn't. They still acted friendly towards him and didn't seemed to be afraid of him so that obviously wasn't the reason.

They just let him have his space because they probably knew how difficult it was for him to trust them and that he was uncertain how to act towards them. It was strange for him to be with humans again after such long time but he slowly got used to it. He didn't trust them but he understood that they were important to Yuu and that he was important to them. That's why he decided to consider them as his friends.

… _Why not them? I bet they would had gladly accepted his offer. I don't think he asked them even once…He came straight up to me…But why?_

" _Because we didn't do that in a long time."_

… _Who would believe that obvious lie? Why didn't he just tell me the tru-_

Suddenly he felt a weight on his shoulder. He looked beside him and saw that Yuu had fallen asleep on him.

 _He seriously fell asleep out here? He's really beyond help…_

Mika looked at him for a few seconds before murmuring:

"Idiot."

He managed to detach him from his shoulder and gently leaned him against the wall of the shed and stood up. Placing one arm beneath his shoulders and the other one under his knees, he carefully lifted him into his arms.

It still surprised him how light Yuu was, even though he knew it probably just seemed that way to him because he was way stronger than humans since becoming a vampire.

He walked to the shed in which Yuu slept in. He opened the door and closed it behind him again. He laid Yuu on the bed and covered him with the blanket. As Mika turned around and was about to leave again he was grabbed by his wrist.

"…Don't go…"

He heard Yuu quietly saying. He stood there for a moment, pondering.

 _He'll never give up, huh? Well, I guess I have no other choice if I want him to stop bothering me with that already…_

"You promise to never bring that up again if I stay here for tonight?"

"…Yeah."

Yuu said quietly, letting go of his hand while Mika turned around, looking at him.

"Only this once, got it?"

"…Yeah."

Yuu made some space for him by shifting closer to the wall. Mika laid down with his back to him.

"…Aren't…you cold?"

Yuu asked after a few seconds.

"…No. Like I already said: Vampires aren't able to feel something like that…just as many other things…"

He replied with a hint of sadness in his voice.

"…"

A few minutes passed without them saying anything. Mika assumed that Yuu had fallen asleep already since he was so quiet. Usually he would talk non-stop so far as he knew him. Since sleeping wasn't an option for him he thought about something to kill some time.

 _Can't believe I really gave in…Well, otherwise he would've never given up… Although I really still don't understand why he wanted me to sleep here in the first place…Is it really because we always did that when we were kids? Somehow I can't believe that. He was way too persistent for that…_

 _There has to be another reason…and slowly I also don't believe anymore that he just didn't want to sleep alone…If it was because of that he could've asked anyone…not just me…And why doesn't he just want to tell me? Sometimes he's reall-_

His thoughts were interrupted as he felt that part of the blanket was thrown over him.

"...Like I said, you don't need to-"

He stopped midway as he felt how Yuu leaned his forehead against his back.

"…"

They stayed silent for a few seconds until Yuu broke that awkward silence.

"…The…blanket is too small for us both so…it's better like this…"

He said so quietly Mika could barely hear him.

"…I'm…really not cold, okay? You can keep the blanket to yourself."

"…Don't want to…"

"Why?"

"…No…particular reason…"

"…Isn't that a little bit uncomfortable? I mean…you barely have enough space…"

"…No…It's fine…like this…"

"…Really?"

"…Yeah…"

"…"

Mika knew it was useless to convince to keep the blanket to himself so he didn't say anything further. He knew he would never admit if it was uncomfortable or too cold for him. He still would share the blanket with him…even though he really wondered why he was going so far for him.

 _I don't understand why he does this…Just because he doesn't want to treat me differently? Because he wants me to treat like a human and not a vampire?_

… _I never asked him to do that…It's not like I…dislike…it. I just don't deserve that. I'm not human anymore…so why does he want to treat me like one so badly? I…really don't get him…_

"…Mika?"

He was suddenly interrupted in his thoughts.

"Hm?"

Yuu hesitated for a few seconds before he said quietly:

"…Nothing. Forget about it."

"…"

Minutes passed without them saying anything to each other. While Mika was thinking, Yuu enjoyed being together with him after all this time they were separated…and he also enjoyed their closeness.

… _I…really like…this…for some reason…being…so close to him…like this…_

… _Actually I…didn't intend to…do that…Before I knew what I was doing…I…already laid so close to him…_

 _He…doesn't seem to mind, though…since he…didn't say anything…about it…_

… _At least he doesn't have to feel cold like this…even though he said he couldn't feel cold anymore…_

… _I don't want to believe that. He is a vampire but…Sometimes I…just think he only talks himself into believing these things…_

… _can't feel cold…_

… _can't sleep…_

… _can't…feel warm…_

He could feel his face heating up a little.

… _It's not true…You are warm…so…warm…_

 _Even though you…always say that…vampires don't have any body heat…that you can't feel warm anymore…I can still feel it…I can still feel your warmth…_

… _The same warmth…you had when we were kids…when we first met…It hasn't changed one bit…since then… Even after all those years…you're still…the warmest person I ever met…_

" _You can keep the blanket to yourself."_

… _I don't really care about the blanket…I…rather feel your warmth…It… feels so much nicer…than any blanket…could ever feel…_

… _All those years…I missed it…I…missed your warmth…This warmth…you always gave me…The warmth I…never felt before…This warmth nobody else has…_

… _I love it so much…_

Yuu closed his eyes and snuggled up to him even more. Mika didn't move as he did that nor did he say anything.

… _Does he…intend to sleep like this? It's not like I…dislike this…but…it…somehow makes me a little bit nervous…Don't know why…_

… _I guess I'm just not used to being so close to someone anymore…It's not like it would be that much of importance to vampires to interact that much with other vampires after all…and it's not like I wanted to interact with any of them…_

… _It's…not like I had…someone I wanted to be with in those four past years…except for him…_

… _After being turned into a vampire…I had not much left to live for…As I could have died that easily anyway…But I wanted to die…I didn't want to live for the rest of eternity as a vampire…As something he hates…_

… _But at least I wanted to save him from the humans…and…_

… _I wanted to see him again one last time…_

 _I knew I couldn't live on forever without ever drinking human blood…I originally intended to end it all if my thirst for blood ever got worse…I didn't want to drink human blood…I wanted…at least a small part of me to remain human…for him._

 _Turning into a complete vampire was out of question._

… _Well, I still turned into one, though. Just why did he had to be so damn convincing?_

 _Saying we're family…that he doesn't want to see me die…that he wants me to live…_

… _That was the first time someone said something like that to me…_

… _The first time…that someone…gave me the feeling that's okay for me to live…_

… _I just didn't want to leave him…I wanted to spend more time with him…to live on with him…to be with him…_

 _I know it was selfish, but-_

"Stop racking your brain about something already. Try to sleep…"

He was suddenly pulled out of his thoughts by Yuu's murmuring.

He didn't expect him to notice he was thinking about something…much less when he was laying behind him and couldn't even see him directly.

"…How did you…?"

"I…always know when…something's bothering you…even if I can't see your face..."

"…"

"…Sleep."

"…I told you I don't need to."

"Then…just close your eyes…Maybe it still works…"

"…Maybe, huh?"

"…Want to try?"

"…I can't."

"Why?"

"…Because it makes me feel uneasy…if you lay behind me like this..."

"…And I can't sleep with your back to me."

"…"

"…Would you…turn around?"

He asked while opening his eyes.

"…If you'll sleep then already."

Yuu put a little distance between them again. After a few seconds Mika turned around, facing him.

"Better?"

He asked, laying in front of him. They looked into each other's eyes for a moment.

"…Y-yeah…"

He said while averting his gaze. He didn't expect that their faces would be this close. He had to admit that this closeness made him feel a little bit nervous even though he wasn't nervous at all before he turned around to face him.

Yuu closed his eyes again and tried to fall asleep while Mika was looking at him with a sad expression.


	3. Chapter 3

Minutes passed but Yuu just couldn't find sleep because he still could feel Mika's gaze on him.

… _Could he stop staring at me like this already?! It makes me damn nervous…and I can't sleep like this…Even though he doesn't need to sleep he still could at least-_

His thoughts were interrupted as he suddenly felt how Mika carefully brushed some of his hair out of his face and while doing it he accidentally slightly touched his forehead. Yuu slightly flinched at that sudden touch but fortunately Mika didn't notice.

… _What the hell is he doing?_

He tried his best to pretend that he was sleeping even though it made him really nervous and he felt how his face was heating up again in that moment.

"Yuu-Chan?"

He said his name with a questioning tone in his voice. Yuu wasn't sure if he should answer him or not so he remained silent.

"…Yuu-Chan?"

"…"

Mika waited a few seconds for an answer from him before pulling his hand away again, convinced that he really had fallen asleep.

"Yuu-Chan…I'm sorry…"

"…"

 _He's…apologizing? For what?_

"I'm sorry…for what I did back then…"

"…"

 _Seriously…What does he mean with that?_

"It was…my idea to escape in the first place…It was me who…stole that damn map…I'm responsible…for all what happened…It's my fault that…they died…"

"…"

… _After all those years he apologizes for…that? For something he…isn't responsible for at all?_

"…I'm sorry."

He said once again before averting his gaze with a sad expression.

… _I'm pathetic…_

 _I can't even apologize to him properly…Even though he's…the only one I still can apologize to…_

… _There's…no one else left…because I…killed them…_

… _All this time…All those years… I…wanted to apologize… And now I'm doing it while he's asleep…so I won't hear what I don't want to hear…_

… _I'm so pathetic…_

"…It wasn't your fault."

He heard suddenly a quiet voice saying. He looked at him again and saw that Yuu was already looking at him.

"You're awake?"

Mika asked in disbelief since he was absolutely sure he was asleep.

"Yeah. It's not easy to fall asleep when somebody's staring at you non-stop."

"…Sorry."

"Never mind."

"…"

Neither of them quite knew what to say. Yuu tried to think about something to tell him after hearing what he said…something that would convince him that it wasn't his fault at all and Mika just couldn't manage to apologize to him again in person. He tried to find the right words to say to him.

"…Listen…I-"

"Don't say it."

"…"

"Stop blaming yourself for what happened four years ago. It wasn't your fault."

"…It was."

Mika said sadly while looking away from him.

"It wasn't."

"Of course it was…"

"No, it wasn't."

"…It was my idea."

"Yeah, it was. But still…you couldn't have known that it was a trap. You just wanted to stop living like livestock. You didn't want to live like that anymore…You didn't want anyone of us to live like that anymore…You did it for us."

"…"

"Don't blame yourself for their death already. They also wouldn't want that."

"…Don't you understand? They trusted me…and I…lead them straight into their death."

"I said stop-"

"I…couldn't do anything…All I could do was…standing there…and…watching…how every single one of them were killed…right before my eyes…"

Mika managed to say, trying his best not to cry.

"I couldn't protect them…I…couldn't save anyone…Everyone died…because of me…"

Yuu looked at him for a few seconds before he sighed and grabbed his hand. Startled by this sudden touch, Mika looked at him again, watching silently as Yuu placed his hand on his chest.

They stayed like this for a little while without saying anything.

Mika didn't know what he was trying to say with that. But he wasn't able think about that in that moment. He was too focused on the warmth of his hand…and the beating of his heart which he could feel pounding against his palm through the fabric of his clothes.

… _His heartbeat…I…can feel every single beat of it…Although It beats so unusually fast…it's calming…I…never felt something so…calming before…_

"…I'm still here."

Yuu said quietly, pulling him out of his thoughts. Mika looked at him again, seeing a sad expression on him.

"That beating heart of mine is proof enough…that I'm still alive…I live…because you saved me."

"…"

"Don't say things like you couldn't save anyone…You did. If it weren't for you…I would have died back then. You…sacrificed yourself for me…so I could live…even though I…didn't deserve that at all…"

"…"

"You know…I was used to…not being cared about by anyone. There was no one…who cared if I die or not."

He gave a sad smile.

"…Never in my life would I have thought that I…could mean so much to someone…that…he would…give his life for mine…"

"…"

… _Always…I would always…give my life for you…Always…_

"…I…know it sounds odd but…Thank you. I…owe you my life, Mika."

"…"

Mika looked at him for a few seconds before he averted his gaze with a sad expression.

… _Even though…it was my fault…and…let them die…and even…left him alone those four years…allowed these humans…_ _to_ _do such terrible things to him…turning him into something non-human …and he still…thanks me…Why?_

 _I did something unforgiveable but…he doesn't blame me at all…I would had preferred if he had yelled at me…telling me that it is my fault…but instead…he say's I'm not to blame for it…_

… _He treats me…way too well…I don't deserve that…I know that…but…why does it still…makes me so happy? It even makes me happy…to be treated like a human by him…Not even once did he treat me like a vampire…_

… _I don't deserve to be treated like that…by him…_

He was too lost in thought to notice that Yuu was still looking at him.

… _he's racking his brain about something again…He should really stop to blame himself already…_

 _Seriously…he didn't change at all. He's still shouldering all of the problems by himself…_

… _Maybe I should try to change the subject…_

"…And…also thank you for…staying here tonight. I know I got a little bit annoying about that and you absolutely didn't want to be here in the first place but you still stayed here so…thanks."

"…"

He still wasn't looking at him and still seemed thinking about something.

 _That…didn't work so well…dammit. Maybe trying something else? Otherwise I can't sleep…_

 _I mean…at least he's not staring at me like before but still…I just can't sleep if I know that something's bothering him…and knowing he makes that sad expression again that just doesn't fit him…I rather-_

"Yuu-Chan?"

He was suddenly pulled out of his thoughts by hearing his name from Mika who was now looking at him again.

"…Hm?"

"…Why…actually…did you want me to sleep here so badly?"

"…"

"You were so persistent about that…Why?"

He waited a short while but didn't get an answer. He assumed that Yuu just didn't want to tell him the reason. But he didn't intend to let up that easily. He wanted to know the reason no matter how long it took to get an honest answer from him.

"I…couldn't sleep well the past few weeks and thought that…it would get better if I had a little bit of company…that's all."

Yuu said since he was afraid he wouldn't found any sleep that night if he doesn't answer him.

"…And why me of all people?"

"…"

"Couldn't you also have had asked one of those hu- …One of your friends?"

Yuu was surprised to hear him call the others his friends. Usually he would refer to them as "humans", not "friends", not even "acquaintances" and surely not "family". He wondered if he got used to them or even got to trust them in this three months he was still possessed by his demon. He hoped so. He wanted Mika to get along with them. He knew it was difficult for him to trust humans after he lived so long with vampires and had seen what the humans did but…he wanted to see it again. He wanted to see that smile again he always had when they were kids. He rarely saw him smile nowadays and when he smiled, Yuu was mostly the only one around, like he would only show his smile to him. But he wanted him to smile around the others, too. He wanted him to see them as his family even though he knew that wouldn't be easy.

"…Well…You know how terrible I am when I'm asleep. I didn't want to do that to them. You're used to that. That's why I asked you…"

He replied avoiding eye contact.

"…You're still bad at lying."

"…"

Neither of them said anything for a while. Yuu saw in the corner of his eyes that Mika was still looking at him, waiting for an answer. He had hoped that he wouldn't ask that question or at least would believe him because he didn't want to tell him the real reason.

As he still could feel his gaze on him after a few minutes, he knew he had to tell him something more believable if he wanted to find some sleep. Mika didn't need sleep after all so staying awake shouldn't be a problem for him but Yuu absolutely couldn't sleep when he was staring at him like that. It made him nervous.

"…Okay. You're right. I lied. That wasn't the reason."

He said still avoiding eye contact.

"…I…asked you because…I thought…that you…could also need some company…since you're sitting alone out there every night…I…felt bad for it. I just didn't want you to be alone."

"…"

Seconds passed but Mika didn't question him further. Yuu thought he had finally believed him but then he said:

"…You know, I don't believe you."

"…"

Mika saw that Yuu slowly got nervous. He couldn't help but feeling driven into a corner by his questioning and he ran out of excuses.

"…W-why not?"

"Because I always know…when you're lying."

"…"

"So tell me the truth already. Why me? Why not one of the others?"

"…"

"You weren't following me the whole day just because you were lonely and wanted a little bit of company."

"…"

"You could've asked anyone, not just me."

"…"

"And you also didn't ask me just because I was sitting all on my own out there. You were literally begging me. You can't tell me…it was only because you felt bad for knowing I'm alone out there."

"…"

"You were way too persistent for such simple reasons…so what is the real reason?"

"…"

"Why? Why did you want me here with you so badly? Why didn't you ask someone else? Why-"

"Because I feel comfortable around you."

He said in a loud voice, interrupting him. There was a moment of silence between them after Yuu had said these words. As he realized what he just said and Mika didn't say anything but instead remained silent, he hesitantly looked over to him and noticed a faint blush on his face which made him blush as well before he quickly averted his gaze again.

"…You're…feeling comfortable around me?"

Mika asked in confusion not noticing that Yuu was turning redder at that question.

"…What do you mean with that?"

"…"

Yuu couldn't believe what he just said. He just wanted him to stop bothering him with those questions already but he actually didn't intent to tell him the truth. It just slipped out.

"…Yuu-Chan?"

"…"

"…If…that's the reason why you asked me…then I still don't understand why you didn't ask your friends…You're also feeling comfortable around them, don't you?"

"…"

After a short while he gave it up to ask any further since it didn't seem he would give him any kind of answer.

Mika averted his gaze from him, still thinking about his words. He didn't notice that Yuu looked over to him for a short time before looking away again.

… _He's having that sad expression again…_

"…It's different…"

He whispered so quietly Mika didn't understand what he said.

"Huh?"

He looked at him again.

"…"

"…What? I couldn't understand what you said…"

Yuu took a deep breath before he spoke.

"…It…it just feels…different…with you…that's why…"

" "Different" ?"

"…"

"…What…feels different?"

"…That…feeling…of being comfortable…it's…not the same like…with my friends…"

They stayed silent for a short while. Mika was thinking about his words while Yuu couldn't believe what he just said.

"…In…what way…does it feel different?"

"…I…can't describe it. All I know is that…it just…doesn't feel the same…"

"…And…how does it feel like?"

"…I…really don't know…just…different…"

"…"

"…Could you…let me sleep now? I'm tired, you know?"

Yuu asked closing his eyes.

"But-"

"Mika. I'm really tired…Let it be for tonight, okay? Just…let me sleep."

"…"

Mika could tell by his voice that he must be really exhausted. He didn't want to hold him off from sleeping any longer since he did that now for quite a while. But he still couldn't help but staring at him, even though Yuu told him he couldn't sleep if he was being stared at like that.

 _He'll probably gets mad at me if I keep him awake any longer…But to be honest…I really don't know what I should do until tomorrow morning…_

… _For some reason I can't concentrate on thinking…It's not the same as sitting out there on my own…where it was easier to think about something…but still…even though I had my peace…I still felt restless…But…being here…calms me down somehow…although I don't know why…_

"Mika."

He suddenly interrupted his thoughts.

"Stop. Staring."

"S-sorry. I didn't mean to."

Mika said quickly averting his gaze.

"…"

"…How do you even notice that?"

"…I just do…I can feel it…It makes me nervous when you're doing that…that's why…"

Yuu said sleepily.

"…Sorry."

He said once again. Even though he wasn't directly looking at him, he still could see him from the corner of his eyes.

…" _Stop staring". Easier said than done when we're so close…_

"…Say…Am I too close?"

"…No…it's fine…"

"Are you sure? I can make some space for you, if you want."

"…No…Stay like this…"

"Is it because of the blanket? I really don't mind th-"

"I like it."

"Huh?"

"…I like…laying so close to you…"

"…"

"…It feels…so nice… What do you do…that it feels like this?"

He asked with a happy voice and a smile on his face.

"…"

… _Is he sleep talking? He sounds…odd. Extremely odd…Usually he wouldn't say things like that…It's a little bit creepy to hear something like that from him…_

Yuu wasn't really asleep but he also wasn't fully awake either. He hadn't absolutely no clue what he was saying in that moment.

Mika wasn't sure what to do.

 _...Should I answer him or should I stay silent? He probably talks about something he doesn't mean anyway so-_

"Mika~"

"…"

… _Seriously…Why do I have to deal with that?!_

" _You know, how terrible I am when I'm asleep. I didn't want to do that to them."_

… _Maybe this really wasn't a lie…_

"…Hey, Mika~"

"…Hm?"

"It's so nice…to have you here with me~"

"…"

"It's really like…in old times, huh?"

"…"

"…You know…I…always liked…having you around me…"

"…"

"…I…don' know why but…I…like it even more now...You have…this soothing…aura…I…really…really…like it…"

"…"

"…I…really…can't explain why but…I…feel so damn…comfortable…around you…Mika…More…comfortable…than with…any…other…person…I…"

Before he could finish his sentence he fell asleep. Mika just looked at him in surprise at his last sentence, blushing even more than the first time he said that to him.

… _Did he…stop talking already?_

He waited a few seconds because he thought Yuu would continue talking. As he noticed that he was sleeping peacefully, Mika exhaled deeply, averting his gaze. He didn't even notice that he had hold his breath until now.

 _Really…He didn't have to say that twice…It's not like I didn't believe him or…disliked…what he said…Not at all…It's just…_

He glanced over at his sleeping face again.

… _No one…ever said something like that to me before…Didn't quite know…what to say…I…didn't expect him…of all people… to say…something like that…_

… _Back then he'd…never spoken so open about his feelings…He was never the type for that…I knew that…_

… _But now…_

… _He really changed over the past four years, huh?_

Suddenly Yuu shifted a little bit closer to him in his sleep with a smile appearing on his face shortly after.

…" _Feeling comfortable", huh? I wonder…what it exactly is…that you feel…when you're with me…Why it feels so different with me…What do you meant with different…_

… _Did…you really didn't know or…did you just didn't want to tell me?_

… _But still…It made me happy…to hear that from you. That you told me…how you feel about me._

… _As for me I…like…being with you…Even when we were kids I felt like that._

… _Back then…when we first met…you were this hurt child who didn't want a family because you just didn't want to get hurt anymore by someone dear to you…_

… _I understood you…because I knew how it feels like to being thrown away by his own parents…To be left alone by someone you thought they would never do that…_

 _You just acted like you didn't care about anyone…The truth was…you did care but you were too afraid to show it…because you didn't want to be abandoned again._

 _That's why you built a wall around yourself without ever letting someone close to you. But over the years you opened up to us…You came to trust us…to trust me._

… _I had the feeling you opened up more to me than to others…Maybe it was because we were the same age…because we were both abandoned by our parents or it really was just my feeling but nevertheless…I felt needed by you._

 _It made me happy…to feel needed by someone…to feel needed by you._

… _But…soon I realized that it was actually the other way round…It was me who needed you._

 _I needed your words…your smile…your warmth…your comfort…_

… _You were my strength._

 _I'm not as strong as I always pretend to be. I was only able to be strong because of you._

 _Without you…I would have given up at some point…I would have never believed that there could be a way to escape to the outside world…because of you I was able to dream…because of you I…could hope…You gave so much hope in those four years…_

 _And even as we were separated…you were the one who gave me enough strength to stay alive… Without you I…wouldn't had been able to live until now. Only because of you I had found the strength to live even though I became a vampire._

 _I needed you…and I do even now. More than anything else…even more than I need blood…I need you so much…_

His gaze fell on his hand which Yuu was still holding, placed on his chest. He hadn't even realized that he didn't let go of his hand.

… _The warmth of his hand…human warmth…Didn't feel that for years…I…almost forgot…how nice it feels like to…feel such warmth…to feel his warmth…_

He could feel how Yuu slightly squeezed his hand in his sleep as if he was afraid he would leave him if he would let go.

… _I…can still feel…his heartbeat…It's…not beating so fast anymore but…it's…still calming…to feel it…_

He slowly closed his eyes, only concentrating on the beating of his heart.

… _I… never…did this before…I didn't know that…it feels so nice…to feel…someone's heartbeat…or that…I would like this…so much…I…never felt so relaxed before…or…so wanted…by someone…I…really like…the sound…of his…heart…_

He was so focused on his heartbeat that he didn't even realize that he soon slowly drifted off to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

After a while Yuu woke up again, slowly opening his eyes. It took a few seconds for him to get fully awake. Only then he recognized Mika laying in front of him.

… _Right…I somehow convinced him to stay here for tonight…We talked and…then I must have been fallen asleep…Can't even remember what the last thing was I said to him…Well, at least he stopped staring at me. I thought he would never stop doing that. It really got quite annoy-_

He noticed that little distance between them.

… _Is it just me or…is he closer than before?_

"…Mika?"

He didn't get an answer. After he waited a short while and still wasn't getting an answer from him, not even a single sound, he understood that Mika had fallen asleep.

… _So much for "I don't need sleep"._

Only now he noticed that he was still holding his hand. He slightly blushed before carefully letting go of his hand so he wouldn't wake him up.

 _Dammit…I hadn't noticed that I didn't let go…_

… _At least he's still sleeping…I really don't want to wake him up since he…obviously doesn't sleep that much._

 _He said he doesn't need sleep but…when I think about it…he must have been really exhausted if he sleeps so soundly…Although I don't understand why he doesn't just sleep if he's tired…He's so stubborn when it comes to something like that…_

 _Always thinking he has to act like a vampire…I hate that stupid behaviour of him…It's not like he's supposed to be like an actual vampire…If he still feels like a human from time to time then it's okay. If he's different than other vampires then it's also okay. I don't care anyway._

 _He's Mika. Vampire or human. It doesn't matter to me. And I certainly won't treat him differently, no matter how much he complaints about that. I know he doesn't really want to be treated like a vampire…That he just acts like that…maybe because he thinks he doesn't deserve to be treated like a human…But still…_

 _I…don't want to see that sad expression on him when he talks about something he can't do or feel anymore because he's a vampire. I don't want to see it. It doesn't fit him. I…rather see him smile. Like he did back then…_

Suddenly Mika pulled back his hand to him again interrupting his thoughts. Yuu's gaze fell on his sleeping face. He forgot what he was thinking about a moment ago as he looked at him. He didn't intend to stare at him like this. But as he saw him, laying right in front of him, with his lips slightly parted and his soft and steady breathing as the only thing he could hear from him, he couldn't avert his gaze anymore.

 _I…Never saw this peaceful expression on him before…Not even when we were kids…Now that I think about it…it really has been a while since the last time we shared a bed…Four whole years…_

… _Somehow I…missed that. I missed to have…someone around me at night…To feel… someone's presence…before I fall asleep…His presence…_

… _I didn't ask him because I couldn't sleep well. Well, it wasn't a lie, though. But the reason was another one. I…just wanted to have him around me. No one else. Just him. I felt…lonely without him by my side…just like back then…_

 _I still remember…how the first night in the outside world was like…Those many nights I couldn't fall asleep…or had nightmares…Those nights I wished…he would be…with me again…_

 _It got better from time to time and I got used to that loneliness but…since finding out he's alive…I feel it again…That loneliness…That longing…_

 _I guess I just got way too used to having him around me. That and…_

" _Because I feel comfortable around you."_

… _Why did I tell him that?_

 _I didn't intend to tell him but…before I knew what I was saying…I already said it…It…just slipped out…I couldn't help it but…it wasn't a lie._

 _I…do…feel really comfortable around him…I…always did…even though I don't know why or…why it feels so different with him compared to the others…_

" _How does it feel like?"_

… _It…feels warm…It's a warmth I…don't feel with anyone else…only with you. It calms me down…so much…when I'm with you…I…just feel at ease knowing you're here with me…_

… _I…really don't know why it feels like that or…why it is only with you…and it's also…really hard to describe but…It's a nice feeling…being with you…A…really…nice feeling…_

"…Yuu-Chan…"

He was suddenly pulled out of his thoughts by a quiet voice.

 _Did he wake up?_

"…Yuu-Chan…"

Yuu wasn't sure if he should say something or not since Mika had still his eyes closed while he talked to him.

"…Yuu-Chan…Where…are…you?"

"…"

… _He's…talking in his sleep?_

"…Don't…leave me…You're…the only one…I have still…left…I…don't want…to…lose you…too…"

"…"

"I…don't…want to…be alone…It…hurts…It…hurts…so much…"

"…"

"…I…miss you…"

Yuu was shocked to hear all these words from him and he slowly understood why Mika absolutely didn't want to sleep with him.

… _Could it be that…he…was afraid? Afraid…to fall asleep and have…dreams of being alone again?_

"…Yuu-Chan…please…don't…forget…me…"

He whispered in a voice that almost sounded like he was about to cry. Yuu didn't say anything. He didn't even know what he could've said to him in that moment. He only looked at him for a few seconds before slowly leaning in, slightly pressing their foreheads together.

Mika tensed up a little bit at that sudden touch but relaxed shortly after and exhaled deeply. Yuu slightly blushed as he felt his warm breath on his own skin.

"…I'm here, Mika."

He said quietly, not wanting to wake him up.

"…I'm not going to leave you. I…would never do that. I'll always…stay with you…as long as I live."

As he looked at him and felt his breath again and again on his own skin after short breaks, he realized that it was the first time they were this close. It was a little bit embarrassing for him but still…he liked this closeness.

"…You know, It was…lonely…without you in those four years…Really lonely…and painful.

…I cried. Every night. Sometimes I…even cried myself to sleep…because I lost you. Because I…lost my reason to live…

…There were even times when I…wanted to die…just to stop that pain…"

He paused for a moment, remembering how desperate and lonely he felt back then.

"…But still…I kept living…because of you. Because this was the life you gave me… You were the one who gave it to me…when we first met…as you reached out your hand to me…and also when you saved me…

…I just couldn't throw this life away…because it was a gift from you.

…So I lived…even if it was painful…I still tried to move on. For your sake but…even though I moved on…found a new family…I never forgot about you. There hasn't been one single day…where I haven't thought about you. From day till night…even in my dreams… You were always on my mind.

…I could never forget you, Mika. I…could never forget the person who means more to me than everything else."

After a few seconds of silence, Mika slowly opened his eyes, looking at him. Yuu stared at him in surprise with a faint blush on his face while he slowly pulled back again but didn't stop gazing into his eyes.

 _Dammit…Did he hear me?_

Mika only looked at him sleepily without saying anything. As Yuu realized that he was still staring at him he quickly avoided his gaze.

"S-s-sorry. D-didn't want to w-wake you up. D-don't be a-angry, o-okay? I-I'm really sorry. I-I won't do it again. I-it was just a-an accident. I- "

Yuu hadn't noticed at all how Mika's hand slowly wandered to the back of his head while he stuttered an apology. Suddenly Mika pulled him closer to him again, pressing their foreheads together once again while he closed his eyes. Yuu completely forgot what he was about to say in that moment and looked at him even more surprised.

"…M-Mika?"

He managed to say after a few seconds.

"Hm?"

"…Sorry…for…waking you up."

He said without realizing that it was already the third time he apologized to him.

"It's okay...You didn't wake me up."

"…I…didn't?"

"No, I…just had a restless sleep…that's why I woke up…It hadn't anything to do with you…"

He said sleepily still with his eyes closed. He didn't want to open them since he thought it was really nice just to feel Yuu's warmth and to hear his voice without actually seeing him.

"…Are you…still tired?"

"…A little…Can't believe I…really fell asleep…Didn't even notice…that I was tired…"

"…See? You can sleep."

"…I never said I can't. I just said that I don't need to sleep…well, most of the time…"

"…"

" _Most of the time"? Does he even notice how tired and exhausted he looks right now?! It doesn't look like he's tired for once. It rather looks like he's sleep deprived and that for more than just one or two days…_

… _But…that aside…I don't want to be rude or something but…He's close…_

 _Way. Too. Close._

 _It's. Making. Me. Damn. Nervous._

"H-hey…If you're tired…wouldn't it be better…you know…to not…sleep like…this?"

"No. It's fine."

"…A-are…you sure? I-I mean…Not that I would mind but…"

 _To be honest, I do mind. I don't know why but It makes me nervous to be THIS close to him when he's awake…So nervous…I don' think I can fall asleep like this…_

"…I just don't want to be responsible for you not getting enough sleep, you know?"

"No, it's…really fine for me…"

"…"

 _Dammit…I really don't want to stay like this…but…I can't say that to him…what if I hurt his feelings? Maybe he just needs that after having that nightmare…_

… _Nevertheless I absolutely can't sleep like this! There has to be a way to-_

"Hey, Yuu-Chan?"

He was pulled out of his thoughts.

"Hm?"

"…You know…It feels really nice…to be so close to you…like this…"

Since their faces were so close, Mika could literally feel how Yuu turned bright red as he said that. He liked how easy it was to get him flustered. A smile appeared on his face as he felt the warmth of his face on his own skin.

Yuu couldn't get out even one single word after hearing that. He was glad that Mika had at least his eyes closed and didn't saw that his face was even redder than his eyes in that moment.

 _How can he even say something so embarrassing with such a straight face?!_

 _He really didn't change at all…_

… _Well, at least he didn't hear what I said earlier…_

"Say, Yuu-Chan…"

"Hm?"

"…Do you always get so emotional when you think others couldn't hear you?"

"…"

… _I'll take everything back._

"…So…you've…heard everything?"

He asked hesitantly, trying to avert his gaze but since they were so close it was quite impossible to avert it completely.

"Not everything. Only the last part. About…how you could never forget me…"

"…"

"…Did you mean it?"

"…Of course."

He said quietly after a few seconds still with a red face.

… _Seriously…Does he really have to ask that?_

… _Did he really thought I could forget him? Was he really that afraid…of me forgetting him?_

"…I…talked in my sleep, didn't I?"

He asked suddenly.

Yuu didn't quite know if he should tell him. After all it seemed like his nightmares were the reason for not wanting to share a bed with him. He wasn't sure what to say to him but he also knew that he couldn't lie to him about that.

"…Yeah."

"…Did I…talk about something that…made you…feel guilty?"

"No, you just…talked about…not wanting to be alone and…not wanting to be forgotten…by me…"

"…"

"…Was it…a bad…dream?"

Yuu asked hesitantly, not sure if he even should ask him that. He knew how stubborn he could be when it came to telling others if something was bothering him. As Mika still didn't answer him after a while he knew he shouldn't have asked that question.

"Sorry. I know I shouldn't have asked. Just forget about-"

"It's…always like this…when I…fall sleep."

"…"

He stayed silent for a few seconds before he continued.

"…I… always…dream of…being alone…That…no one is…there…That…everyone leaves me…one by one…That I'm…always alone…"

"…"

"…I got used to these dreams but…"

He hesitated for a few seconds before whispering:

"…It still hurts…It hurts to…dream…and then to wake up just to…realize that…I'm still all alone…That's why I…don't like to sleep…I hate…those dreams…I hate…that they show me reality…"

"…"

Yuu started to feel bad for almost forcing him to sleep with him. He never considered the actual reason why Mika didn't want to sleep with him in the first place. He never really wanted to know the reason.

 _I…didn't want him to experience that again…I just wanted to-_

… _I'm selfish…I was so selfish that I didn't even notice that it hurt him…That I hurt him…All I did was to force him to do something he was afraid of just for my own selfish reasons…_

" _Stop forcing your will onto others already!"_

… _He was right after all…I'm really terrible, huh?_

"…Do you…want to go?"

"Huh?"

"…You…don't have to sleep here…if you don't want to…If it hurts you that much…you can go…"

"…"

"…It's…fine by me. I don't mind…sleeping alone…It's no big deal. I won't bother you with that again, I promised, right? So…you can go."

Even though he tried to say it like he really meant it, Mika knew he was lying. He knew he didn't really want him to go or sleep alone and that he just said that for his sake.

 _He's still so kind…_

He smiled a little at this thought. For him, Yuu was the kindest person he ever met. Back then he always denied it, acting like he wasn't kind at all. But Mika knew. He didn't know why but…he understood him. He could understand him in a way no one else could. It was the same with Yuu, too. He could never lie to him, no matter how hard he tried. He always noticed.

As Mika still didn't seem to want to go after a short while Yuu said:

"…It's…really okay for me. You really don't have to-"

"It's alright…for tonight…"

Yuu couldn't believe what he just heard. He already said it's okay for him so why didn't he just go? Before he could say anything Mika added:

"…I…don't want to go…I want…to stay…with you."

"…B-but didn't you say that-"

"It's…different…"

"Huh?"

He didn't quite understand what he meant with that.

"W-what is different?"

"…Everything…"

His answer was even more confusing for Yuu. He absolutely didn't know what he was trying to say with that.

"…What…do you mean with "everything" ?"

"Mhm… Not gonna tell~"

He said with a hint of amusement in his voice.

"What? Why not? Come on, tell me."

Yuu asked with curiosity.

"Nope."

"But I want to know. Don't be like that, Mika, tell me."

Mika laughed at his reaction. He sounded almost like a little child in that moment.

 _He's so different from back then…_

He couldn't help but smile. From time to time he noticed how much Yuu had changed in those four years. He laughed more and didn't seem so…serious anymore. He seemed more…happy than back then. He had always liked to be with him but now…he liked it even more. There was something about him that set him at ease although he didn't know why or what exactly it was that made him feel like that.

… _Everything…is different…with you…Yuu-Chan…_

 _With you I…don't feel like a monster…I feel human…because you treat me like one. Because you...give me the feeling of still being one…With you…I'm…not even afraid of falling asleep…Because I know…I won't be alone when I wake up…_

… _Earlier I…had the same dream I always have but…it was different than usual…It wasn't so cold anymore…because I could feel your warmth while I was asleep…I could hear your voice in my dream…and the first thing I saw as I woke up…was you._

… _Although I didn't quite understand what you were apologizing for…I was happy. Happy to know…that you were by my side…not leaving me alone…and…never forgetting about me…_

Yuu forgot about asking him further about what he meant as he saw his smile. The smile he wanted to see all those years.

… _Somehow I'm…not so…nervous anymore…Seeing him smile like that…really calms me down…I wonder why…_

… _I rarely see him smile nowadays…not like back then…where he always smiled…I know he changed since then…But…_

… _I missed seeing him like that…I missed…seeing his smile…That smile which…gave me so much hope…The very first smile…which was only directed at me after being abandoned by my parents…_

"…It…really has been a while…since I talked this much…"

Mika said suddenly with a small laugh.

"…Do you…mind? Since I…you know…don't let you sleep…"

"…No…"

Yuu said quietly looking at him, still captivated by his smile.

"…And…It…also has been a while…since we laid in the same bed, huh?"

"Mhm..."

"You're…not cold, aren't you? Since you only have about half of the blanket…"

"…No…Not at all…"

Before Yuu even realized what he was saying he added quietly:

"…You're warm…"

There was a moment of silence between them. Yuu didn't want to tell him that since he always denied feeling warm. But still…he didn't take it back.

"…I already told you, didn't I? I can't feel warm…"

He said still smiling.

"Yes, you do…"

"No, I don't…"

"…You do…"

"You never give up on that, do you? You're always saying that…"

Mika said with a small laugh.

"…Because it's true…"

"…"

They remained silent for a while. Mika gave it up to try to convince him that vampires can't feel warm. Yuu would ignore him anyway, no matter how many times he said that.

While they were laying in complete silence, Mika could feel the warmth of his breath on his skin. All the time they had talked to each other he hadn't noticed but now…he could feel every single one of his breaths. It didn't make him nervous or feel uneasy. Not at all. It had the same calming feeling as his heartbeat had earlier. He liked this feeling more than everything else.

… _You're the one who's warm…not me. Do you even notice how much warmth you've given me since we're together again?_

… _Your body…_

… _Your breath…_

… _Your closeness…_

… _Even your words…_

 _Everything about you is warm…and I…love that so much about you…Feeling your warmth…is such a nice feeling…I…really like it…_

… _Say…Do you feel the same or…something else?_

… _How do you know…that it's not your own warmth you're feeling but mine?_

… _How can you be so sure about that?_

… _Why are you…the only one who can feel it? Not even I…can feel it…_

… _Why are you even able to feel it?_

… _Tell me…What is it exactly that you feel?_

… _How does it…_

"…feel like?"

Mika whispered accidently.

"Huh? What did you say?"

"…"

"Sorry, I couldn't understand you. Could you repeat that?"

"…Forget about it. It was stupid."

"Since when did you ever say something stupid?"

"…"

"Come on, tell me."

"…"

"I want to know, Mika."

Mika hesitated for a few seconds while he could still feel the warmth of his breath on his own face. Without him realizing he asked:

"…How…does my warmth…feel like…for you?"

"…How it...feels like?"

"…Yeah…"

Yuu looked at him for a moment in silence before he replied:

"…Like home."

As he heard his answer, Mika couldn't help but give a small laugh.

"What?"

Yuu asked irritated by his laughing.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to laugh at you. I just thought that your answer was really funny. I didn't expect that kind of answer."

"…It wasn't meant to be funny…I…really meant it…"

"I know, I know. Shouldn't have laughed…sorry."

"…"

… _I…really don't mind…seeing you laugh…It…somehow makes me happy…I…want you to laugh more…like that…like you did back then…_

"Yuu-Chan?"

"Hm?"

"Say…How does…home feel like?"

"…For me?"

"…Yeah…"

"…Like you."

They didn't say anything for one or two minutes. Mika was the first to speak again:

"…You…can't be more accurate, can you?"

He asked with a small laugh.

"…Well, I don't really know…My…parents abandoned me…when I was still a child so…I don't know how…home…should feel like but…I like to think that it feels…like this…"

"…"

"…You…were the first home I ever had."

He said still looking at him.

"…Why me? It's not like I…was the only one for that…"

"Yes, you were. No one but you…"

"…Why?"

"…Because you were the first."

He said quietly.

"The first who reached out his hand to me…The first who treated me like an actual human being…The first who wanted me in his life…The first who gave me the will to live again…The first who gave me his warmth…"

 _The first who gave me the feeling of being loved by someone…_

"That's why you're my home, Mika."

"…I didn't do that much…"

"Yes, you did…and even more than that…"

"…"

"You made me your family. No words could ever describe how happy that made me."

Yuu sad with a smile on his face.

"I still remember how you said we're family…over and over again to me…"

"And every time you got angry when I said that to you. Always saying you don't have a family…"

Mika said while smiling a little.

"Yeah, I did."

He said with a small laugh in his voice, remembering how childish he acted back then.

"…Sorry."

He said after a short pause.

"For what?"

"For almost never telling you the same, even though you…told me so often…"

He replied in a sad voice.

"…You're…seriously apologizing for that? I…really didn't mind that, you know? I knew it was difficult for you after all you've been through…That was just how you-"

"I always…considered you family…"

He interrupted him.

"…Maybe not on the first day we met but…It didn't take long until I…started to see you as family…as my family."

"…"

"…I'm sorry for never telling you that. I was so stubborn back then. Too stubborn to tell you…until it was too late…"

"…"

"…I always regretted that…I wanted to tell you so badly…but I couldn't anymore…because you were gone…"

"…"

… _I…never heard him so sad before…He almost sounds like…he's going to cry…_

"…I wanted to see you again…even if…it would be the last time…I would have done everything…to see you once again…But I knew…you won't come back…At least that's what I thought…until that day you stood in front of me again…"

"…"

"…I was so happy that you didn't die…That I…had the chance to…meet you again in this life…Vampire or human…I couldn't care less about that as long as I had you back…As long as I…could be with you again…"

"…"

"And this time I won't make the same mistake again like back then. I'll tell you that we're family as often as you did…even more than that."

"…You really don't have to-"

"I want to."

"…"

Yuu looked at him in silence for a few seconds until he spoke again.

"…You know…Back then as I…came to the orphanage I…didn't want to have a family anymore. I…didn't want to get hurt anymore…I didn't want to experience that again… I was afraid. Afraid of being abandoned again…so I decided to never let somebody close to me again and to push everyone away who tried to…Well, it didn't work with you.

No matter what I said or how many times I said it, you just didn't give up. You were so persistent about making me your family. Even when I wanted to be alone, you never let me. You annoyed me so much."

Yuu said with a smile as he remembered the time when they were kids.

"…But…actually…I was grateful for that. It's…what I needed the most."

"…"

"…I needed…someone who…understood my pain…who wouldn't treat me like a monster…someone who…wouldn't throw me away, no matter what…who would give me the feeling of belonging somewhere…the feeling of…being home…I needed you, Mika."

"…"

"You never left me alone…Wherever I was…you were there…You even…let me forget about my past…It was the first time I…thought it was okay for me to be alive…and because of you it was even bearable to live in a city full of vampires…Everything…was bearable because of you."

"…"

"You were there when I needed you the most. Now it's my turn to-"

He stopped midway as he noticed that tears were slowly streaming down Mika's cheeks. He had tried his best to hold back his tears but as he heard all these things, he couldn't hold them back anymore.

He hated to cry. He always hated it. He hated to show this side of him to others. Over the past four years he got used to hide his emotions but…when he was with Yuu he wasn't able to hide them. He didn't know why. It just happened. Even when they were kids he wasn't able to.

But he didn't dislike it. As long as it was him it was okay for him to show this side of him.

Yuu just stared at him in shock, not knowing what to do in that situation.

… _Dammit…I didn't want to make him cry… What should I do? I don't know how to comfort someone…Should I say something? But what? Or should I just stay silent until he calms down a bit? I really don't know what to do…_

He saw how more and more of Mika's tears streamed down from his still closed eyes, along his face and then on the pillow. Yuu forgot about thinking about a way to calm him down as he watched him. He didn't know why but he just couldn't avert his gaze anymore.

… _Back then he…always smiled…and laughed…I always…admired him for that…for being able to…smile…and be happy…even though we had to live like livestock…He never lost his smile…He seemed so strong back then but…_

… _when he cries…like that…he seems so…fragile…Like he could break just from a single…slight…touch…_

Without him realizing Yuu reached out his hand and put it on his cheek. Mika slightly flinched as he felt his touch. He could feel how Yuu began to slowly wipe his tears away with his thumb.

He didn't dislike what he was doing in that moment. It actually felt really nice to him and it calmed him down more than words could ever do.

Yuu did that for a few times, blushing slightly at the thought of how soft his cheek felt like and how warm his tears were, without saying anything and without averting his gaze even once.

"…You gave me so much, Mika."

Yuu began quietly after a while.

"And you never asked for something in return…I know…you don't want anything but I...I want to give you something back for everything you gave me. So…If you need something, no matter what, just ask, okay?"

"…"

… _You…As long as…you're with me…I don't need…anything else…_

Neither of them said anything to each other. Nothing could be heard anymore except for Mika's quiet sobs from time to time.

They didn't even realize how long they weren't saying anything because they were too focused on each other. Yuu on this fragile side he never saw on him before and Mika on feeling his warm hand on his cheek, wiping away his tears.

"…S-sorry…"

Mika said quietly after a while.

"I…I don't let you s-sleep again…I-I'm…really a bother…am I?"

"…No. It's okay. I don't mind. Cry…as much as you want. It's okay to cry. I…stay awake until you…fall asleep so you…don't have to feel alone."

"…O-okay…"

Mika whispered.

They remained silent like this for a long time without saying anything further. Yuu didn't stop wiping away his tears and even as Mika stopped crying he didn't stop caressing his cheek. He noticed how his sobs slowly became quieter over time until he couldn't hear anything from him anymore except for his steady breathing.

He slowly pulled back his hand, noticing that Mika had fallen asleep. He watched him for a few more minutes before he closed his eyes and also fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning Shinoa and the others decided to search for Mika since he still didn't seem to have returned. Usually he was sitting in front of Yuu's shed where he always spent the night but on this morning he wasn't there.

They searched the whole village for him but couldn't find him anywhere. They were afraid he could've run away because of his fight with Yuu the day before but there was also the possibility that he just wanted to be alone for some time, it wasn't that unusual for him after all. Nevertheless, they just couldn't sit around and wait until he returned since it was also possible that something happened to him.

Soon they noticed that even Yuu was missing. Usually he was the first who was awake in order to train, even though everyone told him he shouldn't do that but instead rest a little while longer, but on this morning he was nowhere to be seen.

Everyone agreed that there was no way for him to be reasonable for once and that he could've listened to what they said to him.

Shinoa suggested to split up since Yuu and Mika could be everywhere. They both could be either at different places or one of them had run off while the other was following him. So splitting up in teams didn't seem such a bad idea.

While the others were searching outside the village, Shinoa stayed inside and asked the villagers if they had seen one of them but no one had.

Since she was at a loss what to do next, she decided to look in Yuu's shed for a note or some other clue where he could've gone.

As she entered the shed and looked around she was quite astonished to find Yuu and Mika both lying in bed, sleeping very close to each other:

Both of their foreheads were pressed together while Mika had still his hand on the back of Yuu's head and Yuu had put one arm around Mika.

Shinoa looked at their peaceful expressions for a few seconds with a smile on her face before she left the shed again without making a noise in order to not wake them up.

As the others returned from searching she told them she found both of them and they wouldn't have to worry about them.

She didn't tell them where she found them or what they were doing in that moment. She decided to keep it to herself even though she would certainly tease Yuu about that later.

As soon as Yuu and Mika had woken up and met up with the others, they had to listen how much trouble they caused all of them because they were nowhere to be found and they had to search for them. Especially Kimizuki and Mitsuba were very angry because of that.

When they were asked where exactly they have been the whole morning Yuu just stuttered something totally incomprehensible while Mika simply turned his face away, hiding a faint blush.

Eventually they gave it up to ask them any further because neither Yuu nor Mika gave them a reasonable answer. At least they seemed to get along again since they spent the whole day together like they usually did, this time with Yuu being less annoying. As promised he didn't talk about sharing a bed anymore.

That night, everything was back to normal. Everyone were in their sheds preparing for sleep while Mika was sitting at his usual place in front of Yuu's shed.

It was already late in the night and Shinoa and the others had already fallen asleep while Yuu was still lying awake in bed.

… _Damn… I just can't fall asleep…It's not like I'm not tired…I really am but…I don't know…I feel…uneasy. Somethings just not right…It's almost if…somethings missing…_

" _Only this once, got it?"_

… _I promised. I won't ask him for that ever again. He would refuse anyway…maybe…_

 _Why do I even think about that? It's not like I couldn't fall asleep when he's not with me or something. I can sleep perfectly on my own. I don't need him right beside me to fall asleep._

Memories from that night suddenly flashed through his mind: Their conversations…his sleeping face…his smile…his tears…his warmth… Everything.

Suddenly he noticed how empty and cold that room felt like…how large the bed seemed all of a sudden…how quiet it was without the breathing of the other…and how lonely he actually felt.

… _I really can't, huh? I…just can't sleep without him…I…miss it to have him here with me…to feel…his presence right beside me…_

 _I…really want him here with me right now…but…I promised that I won't bother him with that again…I promised him._

… _And besides…I don't want him to have such a dream again…I don't want to hurt him with that…or to make him cry again…_

… _So…It's for the best…maybe not for me but…for him. I won't be selfish again…Even if I won't find any sleep tonight…_

… _Even though I really-_

Suddenly he heard a knock on the door of his shed. He got out of bed and walked to the door, opening it. He was quite astonished who was standing in front of him at this moment.

"…Mika?"

"…"

"What's wrong? Did something happen?"

"...No…"

He replied looking nervously to the side.

"…It's just…"

"…What?"

"…"

"Mika?"

Even if Mika had turned his face away Yuu still could see that he was slightly blushing in that moment.

"…Mika, it's…pretty late. You…don't show up here for no reason…so what is it?"

"…"

"…You know, you can tell me."

"…It's just…"

"Hm?"

"…I'm…a…little bit tired…"

He said quietly still avoiding eye contact.

"…Can I…sleep…with you…tonight?"

He asked hesitantly, blushing even more than before.

Yuu just stared at him in surprise as he heard that question. He would had never expected him to ask something like that. He looked at his blushing face he tried to hide from him for a few seconds before he gave him a warm smile replying quietly:

"Sure."


End file.
